Soon, though, Ambien started losing its ability to sing me to sleep.
Sleep expert advice series#
I eventually turned some of these visions into a series of deeply worrisome drawings and paintings.
Listening back to these recordings the next day, I would howl like a harpoon hyena when I heard my own slurred, comically slowed-down voice spinning tales of Play-Doh men with ketchup mustaches, Cate Blanchett’s secret identity as a cyclops … you know, stuff like that. For the sake of an article I was writing, I used a voice recorder to chronicle the sublimely stupid visions that the drug induced in the moments before sleep. I saw its surreal side effects as a hilarious bonus. I wish I were joking.Īt first, I was delighted that Ambien had succeeded in knocking me out after so many other sleeping pills had failed. You think I’m exaggerating? Let me give you an idea of just how freaky this drug can be: The first time I took it, shortly before falling asleep, I saw Emmanuel Lewis -yes, the kid who played Webster in the ’80s sitcom of the same name-using a rubber band to shoot a flaming Satanic pentagram at me. That doesn’t happen to everyone, but I’m one of many, many people who go f ull-on whack-a-mole when they take Ambien. Buyer beware: This shit will send you to the land of breakdancing turtles and talking garden hoses. However-and this is important-that drug has some genuinely terrifying side effects … by which I mean it makes you flat-out, certifiable, over-the-rainbow, cuckoo-for-Cocoa-Puffs, sing-along-with-the-floating-head-of-Abraham-Lincoln nuts. For a short while, I did have some success with Ambien.
Right down the line, every so-called sure-fire remedy has failed me. That includes some heavy-duty stuff that was supposedly guaranteed to knock my sorry ass out. As a lifelong insomniac, I’ve tried just about every sleep aid you could name.
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